Here’s a helpful post they wrote just for us and our followers…
Do you feel like you are ‘walking on eggshells’? Or living in fear of your partner’s mood swings and bad temper? Maybe you feel like your partner is trying to control what you do, what you wear and who you see? If so, you could be experiencing intimate relationship abuse.
Violence against women is often thought of as physical violence that happens in public spaces but the truth is that a lot of young women in Ireland experience violence and abuse within their intimate relationships by partners who they trust and love. Our research shows that 1 in 5 young women aged 18 to 25 has been abused emotionally, physically or sexually within their relationship.
It doesn’t matter how ‘serious’ your relationship is, or how long you have been in the relationship for, intimate relationship abuse is real and it is extremely frightening to experience. You might feel that you are somehow to blame for the abuse because of the way your partner, and other people have made you feel but that is not true. Your partner is the one responsible for the abuse.
Juliana Shiel who is a survivor of intimate relationship abuse and an ambassador for the Too Into You project told us recently:
When you are abused by a partner it can feel like you are trapped, like you have nowhere to turn. You can second guess yourself and feel like you are going crazy. But this is not your fault. Young people need to know that no one has the right to make you feel anxious or scared in your relationship. All young people deserve to have healthy, loving, and respectful relationships. The great thing about Too Into You is that it can help you spot early on if your relationship is healthy, so you don’t become trapped in a relationship that is much harder to leave later on. If you are worried at all about how your partner treats you, you can chat to the Women’s Aid helpline team on the Instant Messaging Service available at TooIntoYou.ie, it’s completely free and confidential. You don’t have to suffer in silence.
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If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse in your intimate relationship, know that you are not alone. It can be difficult to talk even to your closest family and friends. You may feel lonely and isolated. Maybe you have been told by your partner that they will hurt themselves or you if you tell someone. Perhaps you have told someone and they have told you just to break up, run, to walk away. But we know it is not always that easy.
Intimate relationship abuse happens way too often but support is available, you don’t have to try and cope with the situation alone. If you ever feel unsafe or worried, we are here.
If you are worried about your own relationship, about how your partner treats you, or even if you’re worried about a friend you can chat to the Women’s Aid Helpline Team on our Instant Messaging Service available daily at TooIntoYou.ie This chat service is completely free and confidential.
Or you can call us on our 24hr National Freephone Helpline 1800 341 900, open 7 days a week.
You may find that talking to someone about your situation will help you to sort out what is happening in your relationship and what next steps you feel comfortable and safe with. Women’s Aid understands how hard it is to make sense of what is happening to you, young women contact us every day because they are afraid of their partners. You can talk to us.
At TooIntoYou.ie you can also take our Healthy Relationships Quiz and read about the danger signs of intimate relationship abuse. You can also read stories from other young women, check out our Online Safety Guide to get information on helping a friend as well as information on legal protections.
If you would like to support us and the work that we do, you can find out more below