Confidence doesn’t always come naturally – But with a few simple tips from our ultimate guide, you can learn to build lasting self-esteem
Here’s a secret, not everyone who appears to be confident feels it on the inside. It’s a lifelong skill, and it comes from focusing on who we are, and who we can be, rather than what everyone around us is doing.
Q: So how do you get more confident??
A: Push yourself, just a little.
Confidence generates more confidence, that stuff grows like the mould in the cereal bowl that’s lost under your bed. So pick one thing you can do this week that scares you. Are you terrified of the phone? Order a pizza. Go on, we know you can do it. And when you do, think about what you’ve achieved.
Was it uncomfortable? A little maybe.
Was it perfect? No, but that’s okay.
Was it fine? Absolutely.
If you’re nervous about speaking up in class, start by asking a question in a smaller group setting. Remember, every step you take towards overcoming your fears is a victory. You’re stronger and more capable than you think!
Even according to Forbes, confidence is all about taking some risks, which can sound dangerous and scary, but it’s not actually that bad! A lot of the time it just seems that way because of those tiny voices on your shoulders telling you it’s bad. But we’re here today to help you learn how to take more positive risks in order to become more confident.
When you look up the word “Risk” in the dictionary, it usually mentions the possibility of something bad or unpleasant happening, like getting hurt or losing something you’d rather hang on to.
Sometimes though, risk involves taking a chance and pushing yourself towards something good! There may be a chance that it won’t work out but there might be an equal or greater chance of it all going exactly as you hoped.
When it comes to taking risks, here’s how it’s done:
1: Embrace risk, and accept that it’s not always bad. Rather, it gives you choices.
2: Weigh up your options. What are the pros and cons? Make a list if it helps
3: Make a choice about making a choice, which is a choice in itself. Sorry, we’re confusing ourselves here, but decide if the risk of a little embarrassment or hurt is worth more than the chance of you finding happiness and fulfillment.
4: Be smart, not scared.
5: Stick a toe outside your comfort zone, just a toe, or even a toenail. It’s not so bad out here right? Be comfortable with discomfort. And understand the difference between discomfort and danger.
6: Be your own cheerleader; visualize a positive outcome, give yourself a pep talk, prepare and practice, and forgive yourself if it doesn’t work out, but throw yourself a dance party if it does.
Understanding and Overcoming Fear of Failure:
Remember, sometimes you fail, but sometimes you learn and get better, it’s all in how you look at it. We’re all just doing our best and learning as we go, and we all deserve to succeed. At the end of the day it’s all about overcoming that fear of failure (easier said than done, we know).
So, what will you do today to prove us right? Share your confidence-building experiences with us in the comments below or on social media using #ShonaConfident
Need a little extra info before you’re ready to take that first risk? Check out our post on How to Believe in Yourself
