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10 ways to slay at being a girl

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We caught up with marketing guru, cat-lover and all-time legend Tracey. Here are her top 10 nuggets of wisdom to steer you toward greatness. She calls it ‘advice from an ageing expert who made all the mistakes so you don’t have to’.

  1. Remember – you are your own biggest critic. That patch of hair that you missed when you were shaving your leg this morning might be taking over your life, but guess what? No one else actually cares. So stop obsessing and drawing attention to it and don’t even dream about skipping football training because of it.

 

  1. Sometimes you will like a boy or girl and he or she will just not like you back. This is a mathematical certainty. Despite how you feel, this is not the end of the world as you know it and you will still go on to live a normal, happy life. I promise.

  1. Get comfortable in your skin – sure you don’t tan, sure you wish you could return your nose/ears/bum to whatever joke shop they came from, sure your scar is the first thing that you think people see. But Girl, perfection is just not a real thing (Cillian Murphy being the only exception). So stop comparing yourself and wishing you could change bits. You can’t. You are you, and you are awesome. There is nothing hotter than a lady who is confident in her own body – so practice that every day until you believe it…and then watch as the world starts to believe it too.

 

  1. If you keep a diary make sure you hide it properly – there is nothing more embarrassing than having your deepest, darkest secrets exposed. On a related matter, never share anything online that you wouldn’t be happy for your granny to see…Because some things cannot be unseen.

  1. Start by believing you can run the world. Don’t let anyone talk you out of trying to do whatever it is that you are passionate about. Parents generally want what’s best for you but remember that a career that might seem “reliable” in 2017 could be obsolete in five years, so don’t be afraid to fight for what you want. Own your own future – it’s nobody else’s.*

 

  1. It is so much cooler to think for yourself than to follow the herd. Don’t start listening to that band just because the boy or girl you like wears their t-shirt. Find your own music. Find your own movies. Find your own opinions. Don’t ever pretend to like something just to impress someone else. But definitely do listen to David Bowie, The Beatles and Stone Roses.

  1. Practice dancing – it might sound lame but the dance floor is a pretty public space and your first night out should never be your first time to try out your moves. I have no doubt that you are awesome but even Michael Jackson spent some time moon-walking with a hair brush in front of his bedroom mirror before hitting MTV.

 

  1. Don’t smoke. If you want to do something with your hands take up piano. Or origami. Yes origami might seem like a pretty vanilla hobby but it’s very unlikely to kill you or make you infertile.              Think about that.

 

  1. Embarrassing things will happen to you. You will blush, cry, hide in the toilet and groan about how you can never face the world again. One day, far from now, these stories will make excellent pub talk/chapters in your memoirs. So learn to laugh it off, learn to laugh at yourself and embrace the quirks that life throws in your direction.

 

And Number 10: I have literally never regretted a time when I had some spare toilet roll in my bag.

*An important footnote to number 5: if numerous people tell you that you can’t sing but you really believe that you can sing and are determined to audition for X Factor…definitely best to listen to the people and maybe try some classes first…or maybe acting.

Finally, here’s Cillian Murphy on a horse…

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